Cuddling a Koala

Today was the day. I was going to hold a koala.

I woke up at 5:30 in the morning to the sun already up and birds chirping outside. Somehow I actually felt fully rested, so I figured I might as well get moving. I hopped on a 7:15 train out of Brisbane and headed up the coast toward Australia Zoo, aka the Steve Irwin Zoo.

The zoo itself was awesome. I fed kangaroos, saw a cassowary that looked like an actual dinosaur, learned about a crocodile that apparently developed a habit of eating people’s dogs, and saw more Australian animals than I knew existed.

But realistically, I was here for one thing.

The koala.

I had already seen tons of them throughout the zoo. They were all sitting in their trees doing what koalas do best, which appears to be absolutely nothing. Very relatable.

Eventually it was finally time for my koala encounter.

There were four of us doing it, including an older couple from Detroit and their friend. One of the women told us that holding a koala had been a lifelong dream of hers, so expectations were pretty high.

We hopped onto a golf cart and drove away from the main zoo into a restricted staff area where they keep the male koalas.

This is where I met Henry.

Henry was hanging out with his keeper, Harry, who explained that koalas can sense your emotions, so it was important to stay calm while holding them.

The woman whose lifelong dream this was went first.

She was not calm.

Eventually it was my turn, and Harry brought Henry over and placed him into my arms.

My boy practically jumped into them.

Was this because Henry immediately sensed that we had a spiritual connection? Probably.

Was it because Harry physically placed him there? Possibly.

Either way, Henry and I were now boys.

The first thing I noticed was how insanely soft he was. I don’t really know what I expected a koala to feel like, but this little dude was basically a living stuffed animal.

We posed for our picture, although Henry apparently had no interest in looking at the camera.

Whatever.

I looked cute. That’s all that matters.

Unfortunately, Australian law apparently does not allow you to simply take the koala home, so eventually I had to give my boy back.

After everyone got their turn, Harry told us more about them while Henry climbed around his little tree.

Koalas spend around 18 to 20 hours a day sleeping and sitting in trees, so their bodies are basically custom built for doing absolutely nothing. They have extra cartilage around their tailbone and a curved spine that helps them comfortably perch on branches for hours.

Evolution really looked at the koala and said, “What if we optimized this thing for chilling?”

Honestly, respect.

Harry clearly cared a ton about them. While talking about habitat loss and what the future could look like for wild koalas, he actually started tearing up.

It changed the mood a little.

Here I was thinking this was just going to be a funny experience where I got a cute picture holding a koala. But standing there listening to someone who spends every day taking care of these animals talk about the possibility of losing them made the whole experience feel a lot more meaningful.

Meanwhile, Henry was still scurrying around his tree without a care in the world.

Eventually it was time to leave.

I said goodbye to my boy Henry, hopped back on the golf cart, grabbed my photos, and started making my way toward the train station.

I came to Australia Zoo because I wanted to cuddle a koala.

Mission accomplished.

But I left thinking a lot more about how ridiculously cool it is that we get to share this planet with animals like Henry in the first place.

Hopefully we don’t screw that up.

Anyway, Henry, if you’re reading this, miss you bro.